


The Last Jedi

by Gr8PwrGr8Rspnsblty



Series: The New Star Wars with a twist [3]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Ben Solo Deserved Better, Ben Solo Has Issues, Ben Solo Lives, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Ben Solo is a Mess, Brother-Sister Relationships, Family Bonding, Family Feels, Father-Daughter Relationship, Father-Son Relationship, Finn Needs A Hug (Star Wars), Force Visions, Force-Sensitive Poe Dameron, Good Parent Han Solo, Grief/Mourning, Hallucinations, Han Solo Lives, Hurt Poe Dameron, Implied Mpreg, Implied Relationships, Jedi Luke Skywalker, Luke Skywalker Lives, Luke Skywalker Needs A Hug, M/M, Minor Luke Skywalker/Han Solo, Minor Poe Dameron/Finn, Movie: Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Parent Luke Skywalker, Poe Dameron Being a Little Shit, Poe Dameron Is A Mess, Poe Dameron Needs A Hug, Poe Dameron is a Good Friend, Poe and Rey are related, Poe is a Skywalker, Protective Finn (Star Wars), Psychological Torture, Rey Needs A Hug, Rey Skywalker, Rey is Not a Palpatine, Rey is a Skywalker, Snoke Being a Dick, Sweet Finn (Star Wars), The Force, The Last Jedi - Freeform, Torture, Young Poe Dameron, but not really, force ghost, like it’s really up to the reader if it’s there or not
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-03-05
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:46:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22708702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gr8PwrGr8Rspnsblty/pseuds/Gr8PwrGr8Rspnsblty
Summary: The aftermath of the attack on Starkiller base, everyone is on edge. The First Order is hot in the rebellions heels and Rey is their only hope in bringing back Luke Skywalker. Only, the man is no longer the powerful Jedi he once was. He was now just an old hermit with obscure viewpoints. Things are revealed, secrets unfold, and nothing is as it seems. It will take a miracle for Rey to make it out alive.
Relationships: Luke Skywalker/Han Solo
Series: The New Star Wars with a twist [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1608505
Comments: 2
Kudos: 31





	1. The Saber of Hope

Rey stood.

Her eyes were burning as her hand stayed reached out. Her arms strained under the weight of the saber. 

Luke glances down at the weapon, almost glaring at it. He was having a staring contest with the thing, refusing to even take his eyes off it. The moment was full of hesitation. He didn’t want it.

Rey stepped closer, shoving it his way. She came too far. She couldn’t be here only to fail.  _ Poe wouldn’t have given up. _ She knitted her brows in determination. She wasn’t here to ask to be trained. She was here to be trained. No matter what. She would fight for him.

“My name is Rey,” She states. “And I’ve come to ask you to come back and fight.”  _ Like you were suppose to _ . She didn’t say that last thought, deciding it would be better to leave it unspoken. 

“I know who you are,” Luke responds, his voice strongly laced with a warmth yet hollowness. He seems ashamed to be standing where he stood.

“Then you’ll know I come from the rebellion,” She tells him, “and that I have special orders to bring you home.” Her voice wavers a bit. Maybe it was because she was telling an all mighty Jedi to get over it and come back to fight in a war. Cause negotiation wasn’t easy.

“Where did you come from?” Luke questions, his eyes distant. Had he not heard anything she said? 

“I’m from nowhere.” Her voice is thin. She thought back to the planet she had been stranded in for most of her life. The planet she abandoned. 

“Everywhere is somewhere.”

“Jakku.” This seems like a major blow on the man. Like he had been thrown a punch that kicked out all the air in his lungs. For a moment, she thought she had to prepare to catch the man before he fell off the cliff he stood by. Instead, the older man looks off in the distance. His face unreadable as it faced the world outside. 

“The rebellion needs you,” Rey blurts out, “ _ I need you. _ ” She steps behind him, taking a deep breath. “I’ve also come to be trained by you.” She could see his figure tense under the coat. His shoulders rising as he lowers his head in shame. 

“I can’t help you.” His words were swift, like cutting through butter. They struck her deeply, leaving a massive wound where her heart is.  _ No? _ Now that was an answer she didn’t expect.

The Jedi Master walks past her, his head hung. Even his own words leaving a lasting impact. 

“No!” She exclaims. “You don’t get to say no!” She spins around, her eyes heating up. An unexplainable spark lit inside her, filling her with emotions she didn’t understand. Some, she didn’t know she had.

“I’ve come from nowhere to find you! To train under you so I can fight against the First Order!  _ Against Kylo Ren. _ ”  _ Your mistake _ . “To get here, I lost someone—someone whom I can never get back!” Her voice trembled. She could almost see the teen sitting on a rock, watching this go down. His fake face filling with pity. “Now I promised I would continue to fight for him and avenge his death!” 

Non Poe eyes flicker away.

“This lightsaber called for me! Now you can run and hide all you like from a mistake that isn’t even your fault, but I can’t! The rebellion needs me— _ Leia needs me! _ ” Luke doesn’t turn. However she knew deep down her words meant something. “Now, all I ask is for you to train me! If you say no now then I’ll leave and never come back. Then I will know just the type of man you are.”  _ A man who wants to run.  _ “But say yes, and I'll train as hard as I can.  _ Fight  _ as hard as I can. I will become a Jedi. Then I’ll finish what you started.”

Luke was deadly silent. Had she said too much? Or had she said just enough? Moments of silence tik by, taunting her. Would he say no? Or had her words impacted the master? She couldn’t tell.

“No. You will not be trained as a Jedi.” Rey feels sick to her stomach. Her walls crumbled over her, burying her.  _ No _ . Why had this hurt so much? 

Rey lowers the lightsaber, she nods, holding back the tears. She bit her lip and without a word walked away. She didn’t see the pair of eyes following her. 

  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Rey made it to the ship to see Chewie roasting a Porg for food. 

A minute away from home and the Wookiee was already hunting. Artoo chirps, welcoming her back. However she didn’t say anything. She just storm passed him, announcing to her makeshift crew that they would be leaving. 

“We are no longer welcomed on this island,” She tells Chewie, who protested. “We’ll find another way--” Suddenly she's hit with the news that she didn’t want to hear.

“What do you mean you haven’t fixed it?” Rey exclamins, looking up at the ship behind her. Chewie explains that she had only been gone for an hour. Not nearly enough time to get the Falcon ready for the trip ahead of her. 

“How long will it take?”

Chewie grumbles. 

“Two days?” Rey couldn’t believe it. She wanted to get off this island of pity and loss. She glares at the ship, unable to stop thinking that this was all a cruel joke on her. She forces herself to take deep breaths to calm herself. 

_ “A sleepover on a mystery island? Who said crash landing wasn’t fun!” _ Rey’s gaze falls onto a familiar face.

It was Poe. Or not Poe. Whatever they were, they sat beside Chewie, wearing the shit eating grin she missed so dearly. He wasn’t real. A figment of her imagination. She knew the boy who sat across from her was not the boy she that she had grown attached to. Her body deflated, shoulders dropping.

Chewie was mid apology when the teen shook her head. 

“I-It’s fine Chewie, you’re doing the best you can,” She states distantly. “I shouldn’t have yelled at you.” Chewie waves it off, being used to it. Working with Han Solo wasn’t arguing free. They had their moments, he was bound to have some with this pilot. 

“Prepare the camp…” Rey instructs. “It’ll be nightfall soon. Best to get a headstart…” 

“ _ Yeah, wouldn’t want the porgs feasting on your eyes, _ ” Not Poe exclaims, looking at Chewie with a smile. He laughs, pretending to hit his shoulder. The Wookiee didn’t respond, obviously. He just kept his eyes on Rey, nodding. 

  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Rey sat by the fire, nibbling on the grain bar. 

Chewie had decided to feast on a whole Porg, devouring it. However ridden with guilt, Rey couldn’t. The little live porgs watched her from behind, staring at her with their big eyes. She just couldn’t bring herself to do it.

Setting up camp wasn’t easy. They struggled to find wood on the island of rocks but luckily after finding some shrubs, Artoo managed to set them up with a fire. The night was bitter cold. Not something anybody without any blankets or flames to keep them warm wants to be stuck in. The night was dark. You can hardly see inches out while squinting. 

Artoo whirls, asking if it was okay to power down for a bit. 

Rey nods. Part of her envied the droid as he shut down, going dead to the whole world. How she wished she could just fall asleep into a slumber without thoughts, without dreams.

**_Crack._ **

Rey’s head whips around. Her eyes lay on the figure of Not Poe. He was standing at the rocks, staring off. She lowered the bar, feeling her stomach clench. Her hunger disappeared, guilt packing her body. His eyes meet hers. They stare for a moment before walking off into the darkness. 

“I’ll be right back,” Rey abruptly stands, following after the figure.

Chewie just nodded, telling her to be careful before turning his attention back to the Porg meat. He’s about to sink his teeth in when a pair of round eyes meet his. Porgs took Rey’s place, staring up at their cooked brethren. 

Rey jumps rock to rock. She trusts herself not to fall. She chases the figure of her dead friend, trying to get closer. She makes it onto a sturdy rock, looking down. Not Poe was climbing further down the island. She should’ve turned around. Head back to the team. However, she placed her foot down on a rock and began to climb down. The water pounds against the shore, spraying her. Underneath her was a drop to her death. She wouldn’t survive the waves pushing her around, burying her. 

Not Poe stood across from her, seemingly have climbed all the way. He waited for her.  _ He was waiting _ . She shuffled, trying her best to get closer. Just a little further. She was so close.  _ Snap!  _ Rey held her breath as the rock she held onto gave away, dropping her. She dragged her fingers down, chipping her nails. To her luck, she managed to grab onto another rock. She heaves, looking down below. The waves crashing and pound filled her ears. That was a close call. She looks back for Poe, her eyes meeting his.

Suddenly the rock the figure of her friend stood on trembled.

Rey didn’t have enough time to warn him. She watches in horror, again, as the ground underneath the boy collapses.  _ “NO!”  _ She screams. 

_ “Rey!” _

Rey watches with wide eyes as they fell into the waves below.  _ He was gonna die. _ She was watching him fall over and over again. _ No! Not again! _ She gives a tight squeeze the edge before letting go. The world around her rushes by in a blur. It goes by fast, yet slow, suspending her. Then impact. The water stung, every touch stealing Rey’s heat. The water rushed through her ears. The water envelops her as closely as her own skin. She swam up, pushing herself above. She gasps for air, frost leaving her mouth.    
  


“Poe!” She calls. “Where are you?!” 

The sound of waves pot a damper on her voice, making it almost impossible to hear her own cries. She looks around the roaring water, trying to stay above. However another wave came, pulling her down. She struggled against the strong current, trying to find her way. She makes it again. Her gasping for air came more imminent. 

Rey’s eyes search around. She could only see water moving past her into the dark night. She sinks faster than before and the panic has her heart hammering against her ribs. Nobody is looking, no-one has seen, she’s alone. She can’t see Poe struggling to survive. He was gone again. She had failed him. When she can no longer hold her breath the cold water rushes in, all illusions of surviving are gone. 

Her head is pounding, every cell her body is screaming for oxygen. She tries to keep fighting until she feels like my head is about to explode. It doesn’t hurt like she assumed it would. It’s almost peaceful actually. She begins to fall. Her body drifts down like angels lowering her down to the ground. Light of the stars shine above.

Beside her, Poe floats. His eyes are on her. He isn’t struggling. He’s calmly floating too. Her hand drifts towards him. How she wished to hold him again, tell him that it would be okay. That she hadn’t meant her words. Tell him that she would go with him. She would be there and never leave.  _ A brother she never had.  _ She falls further and further into the darkness until it threatens to swallow her whole. 

_ “You think we’d just leave you in this dump?” _

_ “It’s too late.” _

_ “Leave here with me. Come home. We can fix this together.” _

_ “One day, we will be together again.” _

_ “I love you, my little scavenger.” _

_ “POE!”  _

Voices echoed around her as the world went dark. The last thing she felt was her body being pulled towards the sky.

  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Rey was in a field. 

She sat, staring at the large ball of light above her. It felt warm on her skin. Like the sun kissed her skin. She wasn’t falling anymore. She wasn’t drifting. She was just here where life was peaceful. She looked at her hands, her body was no longer in the rags she remembered them to be in. She wore a dress of white with the ends painted turquoise. Her neck was dressed in a silver necklace brace. 

_ “Rey!” _ She turns. Suddenly she’s no longer fully grown. She’s a child. 

Behind her was a boy. A bright eyed boy looking at her. He wore brown robes made of silk, his black locks flying in the wind. He stood like a warrior in the spotlight, even sporting a small braid. His smile towards her after seeing her is worth all the portions in the world. She wanted to just stare at it endlessly and keep it with her. 

_ “You’re gonna miss the festival!”  _

He holds a hand out, gesturing for her to take it with excitement. His warm smile fills her heart.  _ “Come on!”  _ The boy urges her on, holding his hand out further. 

_ “Take my hand!” _

The edges of her lips lift to form a curve. She reaches to take his hand. She’s about to cover his palm with her own when something grabs her by the arm, pulling her away. The smile grows further and further away, impossible to see. The bright field around her fades, turning into a dark rainy night. She looks up, wide eyed. She’s terrified. 

Kylo stands mere inches away from her, holding her tight in a grip. She could feel his hot saber sear by her skin, hovering only inches away. She couldn't breath, it felt as if someone was choking her. It seemed as if this was the end of the road for her.

“ _ You shouldn’t have looked. _ ” Wordlessly, Rey watches the saber lift into the air, ready to strike her. She watches as her fate is decided for her. Down comes the saber and everything is red. 

  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  
  


_ “Rey!” _

Rey gasps.

The cold that had seemed mild at first now numbed her face and extremities. What residual heat she had absorbed was gone. The biting cold chilled her fingers into clumsy numbness, cold seeped into her toes and spread painfully throughout her feet. The floor underneath her was rough and unforgiving to her shaking body. Her blue lips tremored, biting out frost with every release of air. Cold stalked her through the mountain passes like a specter death, the bitter wind laughed as it tore right to her heart and turned her blood to icy sludge.

That’s when she realizes somebody was holding her. 

Luke was above her, staring her down. His eyes burdened with worry and concern. He looked over her, taking in her shaking figure. His shoulders are tense like a soldier in a battlefield. 

“ _ I-I’mma miss the...festival… _ ” Rey slurs, dazed. _ “Don’t wanna miss...miss the fireworks...” _

Luke didn’t understand. He just shakes his head. It is as if he had retreated inside of himself; instead of being with the half conscious girl, he's watching in the same way she watched people work. 

“ _ Mmh tired… _ ”

“Don’t close your eyes, Rey.” He orders. “Try to keep them open for me.”

_ She was alive.  _

This thought left her with comfort. She tries to ignore the warmth she felt in his arms. Her head falls back, ignoring the cries of her name, and let her eyes shut. Then there was nothing but a black sea that carried her.

  
  
  



	2. Failure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dealing with the aftermath of Starkiller Base ends leaves the First Order with lots of nasty scars.

“ _ Take that ridiculous thing off. _ ”

Kylo stood at the bottom of his master’s feet, his eyes distant. 

The words spat at him made him flinch. 

Like a droid following a command, he lifted his helmet. The sheer thunder following his words send chills. He clenches his fists, trying his best to keep his composure.  _ Don’t show fear _ . _ Don’t show it. _

“ _ Pathetic, _ ” Snoke spat. “ _ When I found you, I saw what all masters live to see: Raw, untamed power... and beyond that, something truly special. The potential of your bloodline. A new Vader. Now, I fear I was mistaken _ .”

“I've given everything I have to you... to the Dark Side…”

Ben could feel Snoke across from him. His presence chokes him out of the air in the room. His tongue swelled. He just felt the anger burning, the frustration. He had failed. 

“ _ Yes... there it is. You have too much of your father's heart in you, young Solo _ .” The mention of his father is like hail falling on raw skin. It makes his wounds grow sickly. 

“I-I killed Han Solo--”

“ _ And look at you. The deed split your spirit to the bone. You were unbalanced, bested by a girl who had never held a lightsaber!  _ **_YOU FAILED!_ ** ” 

Before the boy could react, a sharp blade strikes him. He felt his skin simer under it. He lets out a horrible scream. One that echoes through the walls. He collapses to the ground, clutching his face. He grunts, trying to keep his tears back. Blood drips onto the floor below him, staining the cold floor. He trembles.

_ “Don’t weep, it’s only a flesh wound.”  _ Snoke chastised. “ _ Skywalker lives! The seed of the Jedi Order lives! As long as he does... hope lives in the galaxy. I thought you would be the one to snuff it out. Alas, you're no Vader. You're just a child in a mask. _ ”

  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Falling.

He remembers falling. The world around him spinning out of control, life becoming nothing but a spectator sport. He doesn’t remember if he screamed as he fell or if he was silent as a mouse. Life at some point went black. He didn’t see the world above. He didn’t feel the. He felt like he was floating on a stream, slowly moving down. 

_ “Mommy!” _

Suddenly Poe was a five year old boy again. He was sitting by a tree. At his side, his mother. She smiled down at him, her soft eyes running over the young boy. The bags under her eyes aged her, making her look twice the age. 

“Mommy, look!” Poe held up a Lampyridae. He held it in a closed fist ball. He could feel the little creature flying around inside, its wings brushing on the soft cushion of his little palm. “ _ I did it! I caught one! _ ” 

  
  


_ “Don’t let go!”  _ She tells him. “ _ Make sure you’ve got it! _ ”

Poe had it. Days of jumping and reaching, he finally caught the little creature that captivated his eyes. He makes a small gap in his hands, taking a peek inside. The small creature was lit, its tiny bottom emitting a light that one could see for miles. He’s in awe.

_ “Now you’ve got it, you have to let it go.” _

Poe looks at his mother as if she had grown an extra head. Let it go? He had barely caught it! He wanted to show his father his accomplishment. How was he supposed to do that if he had to let go! 

_ “But I don’t wanna let it go! I wanna keep it!” _

His mother’s eyes meet his solemn face. With a gentle hand, she lifts his head. Their eyes meet. 

_ “The point of letting it go is so you can try again and start over.”  _ Poe didn't understand. Why would he want to start over when he has already done it? 

_ “You might not know it yet but every catch you get will be different. Not every Lucy will be easy. Some will be fast while others will be tricky little buggers. All of them unique.”  _ She points to the sky. “ _ You may have already accomplished in caughting one but your journey doesn’t end. It keeps rolling. _ ”

Poe watched the lights dazzle in the sky, painting the canvas of black sky above. It’s light sparkles, captivating his little heart with desire. He glances down at his small cage of a palm, conflicted.

“ _ You can hold that one forever but you will never know what other Lucy’s look like or what it’s like to catch them. _ ” A soft caring hand slips under his own. “ _ It’s up to you to be able to let go and stay strong to continue. _ ”

Poe’s hands soften, no longer the iron tight cell. His walls and security crumbled to the ground in an avalanche. His palms crack open, letting loose a light onto the world around him. He watched the light sprint away in a flash leaving nothing behind but a streak of bright light behind it. His eyes trailed the light into the sky. The once simple light through churns. The once innocent memory was replaced with a bright light above him. Machines over him. 

_ He was no longer in a dream. _

For a moment he pondered if this was death. Was he in the afterlife, waiting to be reunited with his family? If that was true, why did everything ache like he had been thrown in front of a TIE fighter and dragged across systems? He realized soon enough as his vision began to return, clearing up the smog, he realized he was in nowhere but a metal room. His arms tied down like a prisoner. 

Poe feels his breath escape when he notices the walls. First Order cells. He’s never personally seen one but by the way it looked with the dark walls staring ominously, waiting to swallow you whole, it was pretty clear where he was. He’s heard stories from people that have been inside, their claims, that the room drives men mad. It’s walls slowly close you in, forcing your brain to tear itself apart from the inside. He struggles in the straps, yanking at the binds. His feet and arms were held back by leather straps that held him up. His breathing hitches. It was more wheezing really, squeaky and worrisome. 

Poe struggles more. Pulling his arm and feet. He feels the leather burn his skin. Each rub was like sandpaper on his skin. He felt the panic begin like a cluster of spark plugs in his abdomen. Tension grew in her face and limbs, thoughts swirling. He had been captured. Worrisome thoughts flood his head. Han and Rey. Were they here too? Or had they managed to fly to freedom? What about the rebellion? Had they won? They had to, right? There was an explosion. He remembered that. He also remembered the world underneath him falling. His life slipping on the ice into the opening of the planet. 

“ _ Nice of you to join me. _ ”

Poe reels as a figure stands. He hadn’t noticed him sitting there till now. He gulps, staring at the masked figure. He casts a shadow over him, covering the bit of light that shone down at him.  _ The man who took Rey. Kylo Ren.  _ So many thoughts but the awkward silence clawed at him.

“So who talks first?” Poe stutters. “You talk first? I talk first?” 

The man’s eye fixed on him, squinting. Almost like he was reading something on his head. It was like he was invisible. His presence was ignored. 

“You must be popular at parties,” He comments sarcastically. Humor was always a great way to calm his nerves. Truthfully, this whole situation had him on edge. His toes curled and fingers turned into the icicles in Kijimi. 

“ _ I’ve heard a lot about you. You created quite a stir. Attacking Troopers, transporting an illegal droid across the galaxy into the hands of the Resistance, and blowing up a First Order base _ .” 

Poe watches the man step closer, his face getting close to his own. For a moment, he thought the man was gonna yell in his face or maybe spit. However, instead he lifts a hand. A hand that hovers inches away from his face. It’s daunting presence made him shrink. 

_ “Why are you so important?”  _ His voice is full of frustration. Seething frustration. His words weren’t to him though. His voice was distant, like he was speaking to someone behind him. 

Poe feels a pull. A small tug at first. Then it grew stronger, gaining strength. It was like he was being pricked with dozens of needles slowly and painfully. His tongue was being pulled, his mouth opening. However words fail to form. 

_ “It’s easier to stop resisting. It’ll hurt much less.” _

Poe forces his mouth to close, biting his lip. Don’t give in.  _ Don’t give in _ . His body is forced forward, so close to breaking. He was on the edge of his discretion. Tears form, hot red tears. 

“ _ Dameron. _ ” The name comes out in a whisper. “ _ Poe Dameron. Son of a commander and rebellion pilot. _ ”

Poe couldn’t hold back his pain. He lets out a blood curdling scream. Tears fall freely, dripping on the ground. He shakes under his restraintments. He couldn’t control his body, his mind far beyond his grasp. 

_ “I see a tree.”  _

Poe could see it too. The large Uneti tree standing. It’s beautiful leaves falling into the wind, drifting away. Its curled bark under his fingertips. All of it rushes back to him. These memories he deemed long forgotten. A past that he thought he could never recover was now front and center page. 

_ “I see your loss, your pain, your suffering.” _ His hand is an inch away from his face.  _ “You’re a street rat with no business in a war!”  _ Poe’s body is slammed back onto the metal table. Anger drummed inside the room, swirling around the man’s head. The release of pressure caused his body to flop down, no longer being held by the daunting power.

Kylo turns his back, his shoulders tense. He now looked as if somebody was pricking him with a dozen needles. For a split moment he can see it. He can see the weakness inside him. Something was eating at him. He’s seen it many times before. 

“You’re wrong,” He chokes out. “This war is my business.”

Kylo glances at him, his mask stares at him. 

“I-It’s my job to fight when nobody else will.” The words echoed through the room. “And I’ll keep fighting. Nothing you say can change that.” Poe heaved, struggling to catch his breath. He coughs. 

_ “That belief you carry is strong...” _ His words hang in the air for a second.  _ “But you’ll soon learn like I once did that the darkside is much stronger.”  _ With that being said, the figure leaves. Following in after him was two Stormtroopers. Behind them an IT-O droid. 

“ _ You will tell us everything you know about the Rebellion, scum! _ ” One Trooper says while the second one backs away. The droid hovers closer, flashing it’s mechanics to the rebel. 

The last thing he remembers for a while is unbearable pain and his voice cutting through the air with a high pitched scream. 

  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  


“ _ It seems the rebellion has managed to clear out before our troopers could get there. _ ”

  
  


Hux doesn’t lift his head. It hung in shame. He had failed. 

Ben doesn’t say anything. He just stands beside him, silent as a mouse. He hung his own head in obedience, fearing the gaze of his master. He felt his body unclench slightly at the news. This filled him with shame. 

“ _ And the girl? _ ”

“Gone too,” Hux states carefully, “We have a reason to believe that she may have found the rest of the map--” Air cut short. The ginger tightens, his windpipe held in a tight grip. A grip he couldn't shake. It choked him, leaving him gasping like a fish out of water. 

“You failed me yet again,  _ General _ .”

Ben doesn’t dare to look. He knew the man beside him was struggling for air. His throat was constricted and his face turned red. His gags are a dead give away of the sinster details of what really was happening.

“ _ I-I-I’m sorry-- _ ” Without another word said, the general is flung. He lands with a thud that echoes. His gasp for life was mercy. A mercy that he would be thankful for. 

“Consider this a warning. Now go, before I reconsider.” The General scrambles to stand. His feet hit the metal ground. Then the doors open and shut. He had left. Now he stood alone in the ship's communication bay. He refused to meet the hologram’s face. The eyes of his own master felt like fire on his skin.

“ _ Something is troubling you. I can feel it. _ ”

“It’s nothing,” He lies. 

“ _ The girl. _ ” His voice booms, echoing around his head. It was everywhere. Nowhere was safe to escape. “ _ Her mention bugs you. _ ”

Ben tenses, his shoulders rising. The thought of the scavenger dug nails into him. Her thoughts. Her mind.  _ Her presence _ . The thought of her made his mouth dryer than a sandbox in summer. He saw her memories. Her life. Felt her emotions. Only for that to be thrown back at him. 

_ “You both have a connection. I feel it. The force surrounds you both, pulls you together,” _ Snoke tells him. _ “Now that is intriguing.” _

“Why?” His words escape him. “Why can I feel her? Why can I sense her?”

_ “She’s strong--” _

“ _ No _ .” Ben shook his head. “This is different. Unlike anything I’ve felt before. I-It binds us, pulling us together! I’ve never felt anything like this before.” He couldn’t think. His thoughts of her invaded. Why her? Even worse, why did he  _ care?  _ Why had this girl managed to knock him down from his feet? 

“ _ This is a good thing, _ ” Snoke thinks aloud, “ _ This connection you have, use it. Find the girl and where she hides. She will lead you to Skywalker. _ ”

Ben felt his stomach churn. The fear sits on him like a pillow over his mouth and nose, suffocating him. Enough air gets by it, allowing his body to keep functioning, but it's crippling all the same. He couldn’t form words or think. 

“ _ Is that doubt I sense?” _ His voice was riddling. 

“ _ No… _ ” Ben shakes his head. “I will not fail you.”

  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Ben walks down the corridor. 

Each step echoes, fast paced. His palms were sweaty and the adrenaline coursing through his system was shutting down his ability to think logically. He wanted to run or scream his lungs out, either would do. He wished these emotions that filled him would just disappear. Leave him be. 

Ben is about to turn when he hears a familiar voice.

_ “Going somewhere?” _

Ben freezes. Footsteps echo behind him, growing closer. Joining him was a familiar General. His piercing eyes look through him. 

“With all this sneaking around you do, I’d say you have a secret lover.” Ben hesitates to keep walking. Last thing he wanted was this man to follow. He had already proved to be a pain he couldn’t shake. However it was clear he wasn’t leaving. 

“I don’t answer to you,  _ General _ .” 

“You’re hiding something from the Supreme Leader,” Hux states with a matter of fact. His voice cuts through any sense of calm with a knife. “What is it?” 

“ _ Nothing. I do not hide anything from my Master _ .” With that said, he continues walking. His feet move swiftly, trying to shake the piranha on his tail. 

“My sources say you borrowed two of Phasma’s Troopers,  _ Fn-6890 and Fn-1094 _ . What for?” Hux rushes to keep up, staying on his toes. His questions were demands. He wanted to know and wouldn’t rest until he got the answer he craved so dearly. 

“ _ Trust issues, General? _ ” The taunt was like a slap to the man's face. 

“Both troopers had been sworn to silence. An order given by  _ you _ .” His voice was dangerously low and full of suspicion. “Not to mention you neglected to tell  _ Phasma _ your plans for them.”

Ben stops in front of a door, annoyance beginning to turn to anger. “ _ Need I remind you that you are a General. You answer me! _ ” His voice was loud, full of power he mustered. “ _ Not  _ the other way around.” 

Hux just glares at him. His own personal emotions of hatred showing themselves like a bump. 

“ _ Do not forget your place ever again or question my duties ever again. Or else I’ll do what the Supreme Leader saved you from. _ ” 

With no other words need to be said, the door in front of him opens revealing his quarters. He didn’t wait to walk inside and leave the General in the dust. 

  
  



	3. The Test

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey may of convinced the Elder Jedi to train her, but nothing prepared her for what came next.

_ Warmth _ .

It was so warm. The heat surrounding her kisses her skin. No longer did she feel icicles forming on her body. She didn’t feel the ice nipping at her, holding her underwear, slowly stealing life from her. She was safe now. 

_ Safe. _

Rey wasn’t sure why this was familiar. The safety and security. She had grown up alone and forced to work. Why would that be familiar? Yet, something made her curl closer into the heat. She felt like nothing could happen. That anything bad was suddenly gone. She was gonna be okay.

Rey stirs. Her eyes fluttering open. 

The first thing she sees is the burning fire. It’s ambers float into the air, doing a small dance. As her vision clears up the world begins to become visible. She wasn’t stranded at shore, gasping like a fish. She was in some sort of cave like hut. Across from her, Luke Skywalker. He seemed to be staring into the flames, watching them dance and flicker.

“What were you doing out in the water?” 

The question was a simple one. Why had the Scavenger suddenly decided to take a dip in the water at night with nobody watching? However the answer weighs her down like a ton of bricks. 

“You could’ve died.” It was a statement. “It was stupid and reckless of you.” 

_ Stupid?  _ Yes.  _ Reckless? _ Yeah. She admits that the whole situation was bad thinking. However the memory was fresh in her mind. The cold water spraying her face, Poe’s face staring at her, the loss of air. 

Rey lifts her body up like a machine. She sits up, not even able to look at the Jedi in the eyes. Her mind was captured by something else. A distant thought. She wanted nothing more in the moment but to curl up in a ball underground and sleep. Her head is hung, looking down in shame.

“I-I thought I could…” Her words trailed off.  _ She thought she could what? Save her dead friend she saw?  _ She sniffs, trying to hold back her emotions. How could she tell him that? “It’s not important.”

“It is important if you’re willing to throw your life out the window for it.” 

“I-I thought I saw somebody I lost. I thought...I thought I could save him this time,” The confession rolls off her. “I was wrong.” 

This drives the Jedi into a heavy silence. He seems to freeze. Like listening to her words hurt him. For a solitary Jedi, he sure was full of empathy. Or maybe pity. 

“The force works in mysterious ways. Sometimes it does things we don’t understand.” Luke’s voice is heavy. Laced with doubt in his own words. Like his words were forced out. 

Rey doesn’t say anything further. She doesn’t have the courage to maybe. She silently stares into the pit of fire. 

“I said I wouldn’t train you as a Jedi.” Luke sighs. “Though I might not agree, it’s clear that left untrain you pose a danger to yourself and others.” The words were like an explosion to her ears.

Rey looks at him, a smile crossing her lips. Eagerness fills her. She knew he wouldn’t let her down. She just knew it. 

“Training starts tomorrow. Sleep now.”

“I-I have to tell Chewie—“ 

“They know. Trust me.” His words have some comfort. They let her shoulders drop, feeling a familiar sense of drowsiness fill her. Despite having just woken up, she longed for the sweet release into a dream slumber. 

  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


_ “Rey.” _

There was a forest. 

In a world full of life, children standing, trees sprouting. She stood among the mix. She saw faces, faces she didn’t know. Yet they rang a bell in her head. 

She stood in front of another kid. A Twi’lek. Her deep brown eyes stared into her own. They stood only feet away from each other. Children circle around them.

From her belt, she pulls out a lightsaber. It’s green light cuts through the air. Without missing a beat, she raises a hand, revealing her own saber. It's a piercing blue.  _ Where had she gotten that? _

They both take a few steps back, eyeing each other. Kids cheer. No adults to be seen for miles. She tightens her grip, her knuckles turning white. Her heart thumping on her chest, begging to be let free. 

With no warning, they charge. Blades clash. Blue and green sparks fly. She feels the heat of each saber prick her skin. Children cry. Chanting. 

_ “Rey! Rey!” _

_ “Lumi! Lumi!” _

Rey feels her legs turn to jelly. Each clash getting closer to her face. She backs away, trying to keep the heat away. However the heat was inescapable. She steps back, and back. Her saber dodging each hit. She can’t even begin to process it when the lightsaber begin to grow heavy. Her arms felt weak under the amount of pressure. This weapon was new to her as it was now. 

Rey’s next step is met with a loss of balance. She falls, mud slipping on her. Her opponent swings. 

She screams. 

Her arm caught in a burning pain. A mark sliced right across her arm. Children’s cheers turn into calls of worry. Her opponent looked just as terrified. However, before she could react, she starts to gag. She drops her saber, clawing at her throat. Her eyes turn wide. 

From the edge of the trees. A figure emerges. Anger fills the world, suffocating her through her tears. The figure steps in front of her, eyes on the girl who she had only fought moments ago.

Her begging eyes.

Rey stares up, equally terrified. She watches the girl fall to the ground, coughing and gagging for air. The figure turns and—

_ Kylo Ren  _ stood in front of her. 

Not in his normal dark clothing though. He wore robes with the sandy beige she sports. His black air was joined by braid. This boy wasn’t the same one she’s seen. He looked so different. Like this boy in front of her was a different person. He bends down beside her, scooping her up in his arms.  _ Worry _ . He feels  _ worried _ . 

“ _ It’s okay. It’s going to be okay, Rey. _ ” 

  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  
  


Rey wakes with heavy eyes.

Her dream had managed to cause real tears in life. She sits up, looking at her arm. To her dismay, a faint mark laid there. She had that mark ever since she remembered and assumed she must’ve gotten it young. Never was she able to identify it or where it came from. 

_ So why did it matter now? _

_ What did Kylo Ren have to do with this? _

_ What does this do with her? _

Questions eat at her mind. So many of them yet little time to process. She looks around. The hut is empty. No fire. No Skywalker. Light streamed in. The door was open. She wanders out. The sky is grey and cloudy. Fog covering the whole rock. She could see the natives walking around, holding baskets full of crops. 

Rey walks further out, looking around.  _ Where could he have gone?  _ She walks out towards the rocks. Then she could see him at the bottom. Skywalker was sitting on a rock, waiting. In his hand, a fruit. She could tell by its bright orange and purple stripes that it was sweet. No veggie looked that appetizing.

Rey steps out, climbing rocks to get to him. It took quite a while to get anywhere. She was careful to place her foot on a sturdy rock. She doesn’t reach the end for a while. When she does, she lands in a puddle. Her shoe is soaked in a small tide pool. She curses.

“Watch out for the tidepool.”

“Thanks,” She jumps over the pool, landing on the ground. She walks over to the seated Jedi, looking down at him. He didn’t make any sign of moving or talking. He just sat there, looking off. 

“So what’s first? Lifting? Lightsabers?” She asks.    
  


“Take a seat.” Luke gestures to the rock beside him. He doesn’t even look her way. With a hint of hesitation, she sits. The rock is small which made her look like a giant sitting on it. She looks at Luke who looked like a statue on his rock. She could’ve sworn he didn’t blink. 

“It’s a nice view. Isn’t it?”

Rey looks out at the waves of water crashing. It was foggy, barely visible throughout. The gloomy sight was a sight to see. However the view was the least of her concerns. She thought of Leia. She needs her to fight. She had to. 

“Very...nice,” She says, “Now back to train--”

“Have you ever tried the Ahch Fruit?” He holds up the fruit in his hand, offering it. “It has a bitter taste but if you eat just the inside, it’s the sweetest thing you’ll ever have.” The fruit is handed to her. A pang of impatience hits her. Sure this was fascinating but the galaxy needed her to learn. She couldn’t sit around learning about fruit and watching the sea. She holds the fruit begrudgingly.

“This is interesting but--”

“It’s an amazing breakfast choice however--” Breakfast. He wanted her to eat it! Then maybe things would speed up and she’d get to doing Jedi things. She takes a deep chunk of the fruit. 

“Taste great _ buuuu… _ ” Buds tingle. Rey couldn’t feel her mouth. Her lips, tongue, roof was all tingling. She tries to touch her lips but she wouldn’t know if they were touching if she wasn’t looking. It was like tiny little needles pricking her mouth.  _ “What’sss going on? Why can’t I ffffeeell my mooouthhhh?!” _

“HOWEVER it’s commonly Torpens Pomus. The citrus is mouth numbing. So once you bite, your mouth goes numb. It’s easily mistaken for the fruit with the stripes.”

Rey turns, eyes wide. 

“What?!” Her words were slurred slightly. 

“You would’ve known that if you waited,” Luke tells her, eyeing the fruit in her hand. “Don’t worry. It’s not permanent. It lasts for about ten minutes.” 

“ _ You talk slow! _ ” 

Rey watched the man chuckle. As if this whole thing was amusing. A whole galaxy depends on her and she can’t even talk without slurring because of a sketchy fruit. She glares at the stripped fruit. It was evil. She tries to speed the process up by gently rubbing her cheeks and lips. 

_ Brakk!! _

Rey turns her head to find a familiar smaller bird eating at the remains of her mistake. It chowed on it, taking a chunk out. Her eyes widen.    
  
“ _ No! Don’t eat that! _ ” She tries to shoo the Porg away but the damage was already done. She watched the cute bird sway on its feet. It shakes his head, trying to clear out the strange feeling. 

_ Brahhh! _

Unable to cope, the porg falls to its side, laying on the ground. 

Rey picks up the small bird, trying to help it back on its feet but it just tilted back like a bounty hunter out of a Cantina. Poor thing just laid there making small noises. She noticed other Porgs surrounding their fellow crew member and watched as the poor little bird suffered.

“Breaktime!”

“But we barely did anything!” Rey complains. 

“You’re right,” Luke nods. “Sit here and watch the waves. They’re beautiful at this time!” Without missing a beat, Luke walks. He leaves Rey sitting on a rock, fuming with annoyance. She looks back, staring at the world around her. However despite all this, she crossed her arms and watched the waves.

“Don’t move till I get back!”

  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


The light was gone. 

The night was cold. Her bottom was numb and her arms were freezing. She was starving and had grown to hate the sound of waves crashing. This made her miss Jakku’s warm temperatures. She hears steps behind her. She turns, looking back. 

It was a Ach-Cat. It’s white fur stood out through the darkness, sat behind her. Its purple-blue eyes judging her, asking her what she was doing on a rock. Its paws had a nice black coating. 

“W-What are you looking at?” 

The Ach-Cat didn’t move. It just taunted her with its presence. It’s freedom to move. 

“Face it, you got dumped.” From the sidelines, Not Poe watched her. He sat on the rocks, looking straight at her with pity. “He left you here and isn’t coming back.”

This drew her final line. She finally had enough. 

She stands and her legs are full of jam. They threaten to cave at the sudden movement. She smacks her foot on the ground, trying to rid herself of the tiny needles pricking her. She stomps away, her face a deep red. The Ach-Cat watched her go, it’s eyes never leaving the back of her head. 

  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Rey stormed through the small village, her legs carrying her quickly across the field. She tries not to let her anger show when she finds the Jedi Master sitting by a small fire, cooking a pot of god knows what. 

Luke notices her approaching.

“Oh, you finally came!”

“You said you’d come back and teach me!” Rey flaps her arms out dramatically. Her face is burning. 

“Oh yes,” Luke nods, “I forgot about that.” 

Rey wanted to tear her hair out. Yank every single strand out and scream. Scream on the top of her lungs. When the frustration builds, she feels like her whole body is gonna explode. She’s lived, so lost in that moment and the torment her brain was in.

“Well, here's some food!” Luke holds out a bowl. “It got potatoes, liliac trout, saltpepper--”

Rey groans dramatically, turning her heels. Despite her hunger, she refused to even look at the man. She marches straight back to god knows where. She needed a break. 

  
  
  
  


-

  
  


Rey sat on another rock. Far up above.

Stem was coming off her body. She had never felt such frustration and anger. A whole day wasted and she was no step closer in becoming the thing everyone needs. A warrior. A fighter. A  _ hero _ .

“ _ You’re angry. _ ”

Rey spins around expecting Skywalker or Not Poe.

To her dismay, a familiar dark figure stands behind her. A pair of brown eyes meet hers. It was Kylo— _ Ben _ . 

“ _ It seems in your anger you brought me here, _ ” Ben states in a matter a fact. 

“Get away from me!” Rey is burned. Her skin is boiling. She hated him. His face, his voice, his eyes. Every part of her wanted to strangle him. 

“ _ Why are you so upset? _ ” 

“Leave me alone!” Rey spits. She searches her belt, pulling out a familiar blade. She watches the boys eyes fall onto the weapon. There’s a sense of familiarity there on both sides.

“ _ Where did you get that? _ ” 

Rey tightens her grip, flexing her fingers near the ignition. She could see the fuming emotions in his eyes. 

“ _ That lightsaber doesn’t belong to you!”  _ Ben steps closer, his face becoming clearer. A new mark covers his face. One that took up a good chunk of his face. It looked to be barely in the process of healing. “ _ It belongs to me! _ ”

“Get out!” Rey throws her hands out, pushing. She pushed until the man disappeared. No longer was he in sight. She collapses. Her knees falling to the rocks. She’s beyond drained. 

She looks up at the spot her enemy once stood and couldn’t help but feel cold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to ask any questions pending the story! Just wanna know how y’all like it so far  
> Anyways, thanks for reading!


	4. FN-2187

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> FN-2187 just wanted to have an easy job. Unfortunately he unveils something unforgettable. 
> 
> Kylo is struggling with his anger and his bond with Rey. Nothing makes sense to him why the force was so keen to pull him towards her or the rebellion pilot.

“ _ FN-2187! _ ”

FN-2187 stood straight in a long line of young trooper cadets. His fellow cadets glance at him, watching him. Some wore envy while others picked a face of pity. 

Phasma stood in her glory, eyeing down the cadet. Even with a helmet, her lack of faith in the younger trooper stood strong. 

“ _ Report to sanitation in the prison ward. _ ” Giggles echo behind him. For he had once again been giving the scut work. Despite being a laughing stock among his peers, he found the scut work far more enjoyable than being trained in the field of battle. 

With a tall head, he grabbed the cleaning supplies from Phasma’s hands and took off. When he was sure his Captain wasn’t watching, he had a skip in his step. 

  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


“ _ Alright kid, I want all these cells wiped clean. Top to bottom. Here’s the key. We don’t have any prisoners in this wing so this will be easy. _ ” 

FN-2187 was handed an access card. Any lack of power he had before was made up by the card in his hand. Unlimited access in this whole corridor. Normally it’d take years of moving up the ranks to gain access. For him, it took a few minutes and a mop. 

“ _ Try not to touch anything expensive. Don’t need you to break anything _ .” 

Withthat, he was left alone with a whole corridor of cells to clean and only a bucket and mop. He bites the dust and starts his duties. Twenty cells in total were mainly used to hold war criminals and such. Each room he had to scrub, pretending to not care about the men or woman who previously slept with her. He scrubs each inch with everything he’s got. He even does the walls, spraying them down with cleaner before wiping down. Each cell had a story and his job was to clean up the details left behind when the ink runs out.

He hummed. Mostly to pass time as he scrubs away. He hums the only song he knows. The anthem that was imprinted in him. The First Order’s Anthem. He didn’t know any other material and it helped pass time. 

Soon the final cell in that block was surprisingly clean. Even though he’s pretty sure the last capture was a Huttese. He scrubs up the last specks, washing down the last specks of dirt. He was proud to say he could see his own reflection! 

FN-2187 rolled out, pushing his cart out. He moved down halls, taking himself back up the corridor. He was about to move to check in and prep himself for his next orders. However as he was about to exit, he saw something. At the end of the hall, in front of the cell wards, two troopers walked out. At first the sight was odd but what followed was odder. IT-O, a droid for interrogation, follows them. 

_ “Well that was another waste of time.” _

What had they been doing there? Curiosity ate at him as the sight of the men leaving passed him. He walks forward, pushing along the mop and bucket of water. His eyes remain on the door.

He stops in his tracks, staring at the door.  _ What were they doing here? _ The teen had never seen this door before until now. It practically blended in with the walls.  _ Had he missed this cell room?  _

_ No.  _ Each cell room was on a complex map that he remembers. He’s been through this hall dozens of times and never had seen anything like it.

A question bags at him. What kind of cadet doesn’t know of their own building? 

Phasma wanted the best of her soldiers. Do their work with pride and honor. What pride did he have now? Without missing another second, he moves towards the door, pulling out his access card. He searches for the reader but doesn’t see one.  _ How on earth did the walls open without a reader? _

FN-2187 examines the wall, running his fingers across the metal walls. He runs them down until suddenly he hits something odd.

The walls fly open, granting him access to the mystery inside. 

However, expecting to see just another jail cell, he sees another sight. A boy, around his age, is bound down by his limbs on a table. He was out of it, sweat coating his skin. He looked like he had been through hell and back.

The kids head lifts, acknowledging his prescribe.

**_Bang!_ **

The young trainee drops everything in his hands, letting the mop collide with the ground below. 

“I-I thought there were no prisoners—I’m sorry—I should—“ FN-2187 stutters over his words, trying to find the switch that’d close the door. 

“Stop!” The prisoner snaps, holding his hands up. “If they hear you, they’ll come back with that stupid droid! I barely got them to think I passed out!” 

FN-2187 knew what he should do. Shut the door and report to Phasma. There were no prisoners supposed to be in this wing. This meant this guy was technically not supposed to be here. 

FN-2187 was about to run out and look for help when suddenly,

“ _ Wait! _ ” The prisoner looks at him, staring straight through him. “ _ Don’t go! _ ”

Before he could hear anymore, he heard footsteps coming this way. He could hear voices echoing. Quickly the cadet scrambles out, his eyes wide. 

Phasma walked the halls. Standing tall with her entourage of chosen troopers to walk with her. She was on her way to god knows where when FN-2187 ran at her. 

“ _ FN-2187.”  _ Phasma acknowledges, stopping in her tracks. “ _ What’s the meaning of this? Why have you left your station? _ ” 

“ _ Cleaning! Prisoner! _ ” FN-2187 exclaims, out of breath. “ _ There’s a prisoner in the C wings! _ ”

“ _ Impossible _ .” Disbelief. Phasma didn’t seem to believe anything he said. “ _ No cell should be in use in that wing. If there was a prisoner there, I would know and it would be in the system.”  _

“But I saw him! H-He was strapped down to an interrogation table! He  _ spoke _ !” 

“ _ If what you say is true, then bring me to him.” _ FN-2187 wasted not another second. He led them through the halls, taking them down the route he went. It wasn’t until he made it to the cell did he lose all confidence. The once open walls were now closed. A normal wall to its place. 

“ _ Is this a joke?” _

He touches the wall, shaking his head. He could’ve sworn—

“It was right here! I saw it!” FN-2187 turned towards his captain, wide-eyed. His mouth is dry. Phasma just shook her head in disappointment and humiliation.

“ _ Report back to your station cadet. We will determine your punishment later for abandoning your station AND wasting my time.”  _ Before he could speak, Phasma turned on her heels and marched right out. 

Embarrassment flooded him. He glances back at the wall, swore he saw something.

Phasma walked past him, her head held up high in glory. Behind her, the two Stormtroopers barely glance at him. The second one takes the chance and knocks over his equipment, letting everything fall with a bang. 

FN-2187 lowers his head, gathering his equipment. He took one last at the door before leaving. 

  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Red cuts through the air.

_ Slash. Anger. Slash. Fury. Slash. Fire.  _ One by one practice droids fell, slashed in half. Sweat beads down his forehead, dripping. His lightsaber illuminates his body, tense and destructive. 

“ _ You call that good work?”  _

Ben huffs, breathing in heavily. 

His fingers clench, eyes stuck on the floor. His back hunched, face pale. 

“ _ You’re distracted. _ ” 

Ben doesn’t speak a word. He just inhaled and exhaled then repeated. His eyes were glossy, jaw clenched. His tongue was dry, like somebody had come and took all the moisture from it.

“ _ Have you made contact with the girl? _ ” 

No response.

“ _ So you have.” _

Ben could feel it all around. His presence. It was holding him on the shoulders, body pressed close to his own. It turns his body to ice. 

“ _ What have you learned? _ ”

“She’s unstable,” Ben forces out, “She’s struggling to keep control. I can feel her inner turmoil. It’s eating her alive.” 

“ _ Not for long. If she reaches Skywalker then she will be trained. She will be stronger.” _

Ben feels something on the tip of his mouth.  _ A question.  _ One that wanted to be asked and answered. However he couldn’t form the words. 

“ _ There’s yet another problem.” _

Before Ben could ask, the door to his training room was opened. Footsteps. 

“ _ You.”  _ His voice lingers, filling his head. In his mind. “ _ Whatever doubt you carry must be vanquished before the next battle.”  _ Something pricks his cheek. A burn of ice. Like a man with ice for a hand was grabbing him. “ _ My young apprentice, do not fail me again. Or else next time, I’ll be less forgiving.” _

  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


“ _ Where’s the Rebel Fleet _ ?”

“You guys sure are thick if you think I knew.” Poe was strung out, sweat flowing down his head. He sported a nasty gash on his head that had caked his forehead with blood. 

IT-O grows closer, showcasing its new fancy upgrade that’ll make sure he wouldn’t be left without something to cry about. He struggled, pulling his head away. He whimpers, struggling to hold back any further. He anticipates pain, lots of it. 

The doors fly open.

Footsteps echoes.

“ _ I need to speak to the prisoner. Alone. _ ” Kylo Ren stands, staring at him from the door. 

The Stormtroopers share a glance, maybe confusion. They don’t do much thinking though cause both call the droid off him. The teen is sighing in relief as the droids mega sharp heated blade was pulled away from his face. However that blade was replaced with the heavy silence of a masked man as they’re left alone. 

_ “You’re in pain.” _

“Noooo, I’m just sleeping,” Poe bites out. His heavy breaths rock his body, eyes glaring at the figure above him. His heavy footsteps vibrate through him, curling his fingers. 

_ “Are you hungry? Can I offer you anything?”  _ The offer is meant to be a peace offering. A friendly gesture. 

“Sure, got any portions under that ugly mask?” 

The comment was meant to get a stir, bust balls. Maybe even offend him, making himself feel bigger. It was all he got left. Those troopers stole his pride but he wouldn’t let this man take his dignity. To his shock, a portion is tossed to him. A piece of bread has never looked tastier. Now he’s gone days without eating on the street, but this felt worse. Maybe it’s because he’s a prisoner inside a hell being tortured for hours at end with only a few interludes. Without another beat, he’s dropped, his arms and legs collide on the floor. He could’ve swore he heard a few mysterious cracks coming from his body however that didn’t matter once he manages to latch his greedy fingers on the portion. 

_ Pride? Who cares! _ He was starving. He regretted not eating before crash landing in a giant Starkiller base. He munched and munched, swallowing the dry piece of portion bread. It’s fluffiness made him believe he was biting into a cloud. A cloud of food heaven. He’s done faster than a Spice Runner out running Troopers. 

“ _ You’re impressive. Most men would break before IT-O even got to level one of interrogation. _ ” 

Poe stares up at the man, staying down on his knees. He watched him walk across the room, taking a seat on the metal bench that was used for the Troopers to watch him as IT-O let all hell loose. 

“ _ Got nothing to say?” _

“Haven’t heard of a breath mint?” Poe couldn’t help himself. His words flew out without warning. Even in the darkest of situations, his sarcasm couldn’t be tamed. It was an uncontrollable habit. Also the man was asking for it! Who was he to say no?

Suddenly he felt it again. The brush on his head. The hairs to his neck stand. He knew exactly what this man was doing. 

“ _ You use humor as a shield, _ ” He reads allowed, “ _ Deep down you’re just a scared little boy trying to find his place in this big scary world. _ ”

Poe wanted to throw up. His words were twisted in a way that was to mock him and his youth. His stomach knots, vomit crawling up his throat. He hated this. He felt him roaming around inside his head, picking apart his brain like a storage unit. 

“ _ You’re in pain. Every breath you take is like bricks to you.” _ Further, deeper. Poe’s brain is an open book being picked through pages, skipping through.  _ “I see death. Death follows you like a plague.” _

Poe’s fingers dug into the ground as his whole body shakes. He takes heavy breaths, each one labored and shaky. His brows knit together as a flood of memories are brought back.

_ “Your guilt eats you up inside. You got to live while so many died around you. You’re like a parasite, killing those around you.” _

Poe wasn’t sure where he found the courage. He stands, jumping up like a Lothal Cat finding its prey. Anger burning through his veins. He raises his hands, ready to rip the man’s mask straight off his stupid face. However he’s frozen mid attack. His limbs locked, his body paralyzed. 

Kylo had his hand raised out, holding it up towards him. He stands up, looking down at his body.

“ _ Such emotion coursing through you.” _

His hand grew closer and closer until he was a few inches away. With a sudden bravery, Poe sinks his teeth into the hand. 

Kylo curses, ripping his hand away. 

Poe is thrown back onto the tourtue table, straps tightened around his four limbs. This time is tighter than before. 

“ _For such a small child,_ _you're full of surprises._ ” The snark comment was thrown bitterly. Kylo shook his hand, trying to make the pain leave quicker. _“But I have surprises of my own.”_

Poe couldn’t breath. His air is cut off, his lungs clutching. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t breath. He trembled in his straps, his hands clawing at the metal table. He was

Terrified. 

Kylo stares him down from the table. His hand trembled. 

Poe stares at the man, his eyes blown cartoonishly wide. He didn’t want to die like this. He didn’t want to die, period. However nothing could change the fact he was staring death straight in the eyes. 

Then nothing. His lungs inflate, his eyes blink. He heaved, greedily sucking up oxygen. He almost forgets about everything happening around him. He was just glad to have air in his lungs again.

Without a single word, the other man drops his hand. He turns around and walks out. Heavy footsteps echo behind him.


	5. R2 Units Never Forget

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A bittersweet reunion and revelations of what happened outside the island.

Rey wasn’t sure what compelled her to stand by the water. She watched the waves around her crash. Each splash rings in her ears. 

She raises a hand like she had seen before. She focuses on the water, it’s powerful strikes against the rocks. She thought of Leia back at the base, her waiting for her to return with a lightsaber and a Jedi Master. Han laying in the chamber, hanging on by a thread. Then bitterly, she thought of him.  _ Ben _ . His face. His eyes. His pain. His saber cutting through his father. Poe falling, screaming for her. His terrified eyes begging for her to save him.

_ “I love you, my little scaven--” _

Rey shouts in frustration, throwing her hand down in defeat. The waves didn’t move, they didn’t perform some life changing experience. They were the same as they had been. Unpredictable, cluttered, loud.

_ “Wow, I’m pretty sure the water loves it when kids aggressively yell at it,” _ Not-Poe tells her, appearing to be seated on the edge of the large cliff.

”Why won’t it work?!” She asks. She isn’t sure who she’s asking. Herself, or the hallucination. 

_ Patience _ .

Rey turns her head. The message ringing in her ears like a bell. Lone behold, Luke Skywalker stood behind her. His tone looked uneasy. As if her presence was somehow this awful thing he couldn’t stand to be around. He inhales and exhales. 

Rey looks back to the water. It’s rough currents smacking against the rocks. 

“You lack patience.” 

His words are like chains, pinning her down. She feels her face go red hot. She wanted to scream her head off. She was nowhere closer to winning the war. She was stuck in a sand pit, slowly sinking. 

“Just like I did.” Luke’s face is distant. Reminiscent about a past she didn’t get to see. She just stood by the cliff, staring down at the water in frustration. Yet something lets her shoulders drop. 

“I don’t have time. My friends need me-- _ your sister _ needs me.” Rey empizasises that last part. “I don’t have the luxury to sit and be made a fool of.” She wants to walk, run back home to Jakku and wait. However, how could she? Leia needed her--the rebellion needed her! If she walked away, their hope disappears in a cloud of dust. 

“I was testing you. If you don’t have patience then you will make the same mistakes I made.” Rey is silent now. She doesn’t speak for she couldn’t. She just wanted to sit down and cry. Cry and disappear. 

“Is that why you wouldn’t train me as a Jedi before?” Her voice is small. “I-I can do it. I can become a Jedi! I won’t fail you.”  _ Like he did.  _ That last part was in her head yet hit very deep.

“I don’t doubt that,” Luke sighs, “But there are something’s, not even you could understand.”

“Like why you won’t come back with us?”

A pause.

“Yes.”

  
  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Luke watches from a distance.

Rey walking towards the falcon, going towards the familiar ship. She’s greeted by a familiar furry wookie.  _ Chewie! _ He gives a smile, walking towards the pair. The wookiee lets out a loud shout, happily telling him that he was glad he was here. 

“I’m glad to see you too Chewie.”

In a state of awe, the Jedi places a trembling hand onto the Falcon. He closes his eyes, his fingers clenching on the hard metal. Wordlessly, he walks past them. His footsteps taking him towards a familiar ramp. 

He didn’t see Rey put a hand out towards the Wookiee who had tried to stop him. 

“Let him,” She tells him, “He has to know.”

“ _ Fast ship? You’ve never heard of the Millennium Falcon? _ ”

Luke doesn’t stop himself from stepping on board. His feet carried him before he could stop himself. Foot after foot. Step by step. Everything was exactly as he remembered. It was like he was a young boy again, discovering the world. Sure there were a few odd things like different colored metal plates or strange dents. God forbid he found out what made them. 

He runs his fingers down the walls, treading them through the rough cool metal. He couldn’t contain his smile. 

“ _ It’s the ship that made the Kessel Run in less than twelve parsecs! _ ”

Luke walked a familiar path, memories flooding him. The pilot cockpit was all the same. The same chairs, controls, and wide view. He remembered his first time on, being chased down. He could practically hear Han’s snark voice. Ben’s calm figure. He mapped out the memory, imaging the scene again infront of him.

A familiar sight of gold catches his hand.  _ Dice _ . Hanging from the Falcon was a familiar gold dice. Han’s dice. His hands wrap around them, holding them carefully in his palm for it was the man’s prized possession. He feels the air leaves his lungs in a swift punch. He felt a pit worm its way into his stomach. He couldn’t help but feel a sense of cold send down his spine. He pulled back, looking at the two. 

“Where’s Han?” 

“I’m sorry,” Rey speaks up from behind him. “In our last battle, he sacrificed himself to help his son.” Her words are shattering. Everything felt wrong. The air was thin, and the world felt uneven. Like something was missing. “They won’t know if he’ll make it.” 

Rey didn’t want to drop this, but she knew he deserved the truth. Nobody should be lied to. Not with matters like this. No matter how much the hermit got on her nerves or runs away. She knew the odds of Han ever coming back, but she chose to ignore them. She had faith he’d wake up. One day. Then she’d tell him everything. Her journey as a jedi, the falcon flying with Chewie, and maybe even tell him that she would love to take his offer. 

However the solemn face on the Jedi Master was clear that he didn’t share her optimism.

Luke couldn’t breath. He felt as if he was being force choked on the spot. He couldn’t stand. He collapses in a seat, staring at the ground below. His face lost any color it had left. He thought of the smuggler. These years without him were brutal and now, it felt like any will to stand was gone. His fingers wrap around the dice, clutching them with all his strength. 

_ Beep-boop! _

Rey steps aside, revealing a familiar blue and grey Astro-Mech. 

“Artoo,” Luke exclaims, a smile spreading on his lips. “ _Artoo!_ ”

Artoo was practically jumping with joy. His receptors stuck on the familiar old man. He exclaimed dozens of beeps and chirps. All of them were exclamations of joy to see him. Joy that was equally shared.

“Yes I know.” Luke nods along, listening to the droid carefully. However Artoo didn’t seem to calm down. This only made the droid throw more at him. “ _Hey_ , _sacred planet_ , _watch the language_!”

That stops the droid faster than a control shock from a droid boot. “Old friend…” Luke places a comforting hand on the droids head. 

Rey watches from the side lines, her eyes soft. She had never seen this droid so festered up and alive before. He had always been quiet and more reserved. Always off in its own world. 

“I wish I can make you understand but I’m not coming back…” If the droid had eyes, they would be full of dejection and sadness that only the two would understand. He lets out a low small single beep. “Nothing can make me change my mind.”

Rey steps out, unable to watch further. She couldn’t handle watching Artoo being abandoned the same way she was. Left with no idea why. To go days wishing for an answer but never could really understand. 

Luke notices her leave, his mouth opening. He wanted to follow, go after her. Tell her everything he knew. Tell her that he was sorry for his mistakes. Sorry that the life she lives isn’t one full of life and prosperity as he wished. However something else catches his attention. 

“ _ Years ago you served my father in the clone wars... _ ”

Luke’s eyes go wide as he spins to look at what the droid had done. The message. The message of hope. What started all of this.  _ Leia _ . Artoo had put it on just for him.

“ _ Now he begs for you to help in the struggle against the empire. _ ” 

Luke watches, filling with the same wonder and bewilderment he felt as a young boy. However this time, tears prick his eyes. 

**_“Aren’t you a little short for a stormtrooper?”_ **

**_“My name is Luke Skywalker and I’m here to rescue you!”_ **

To see his sisters face once again was enough to kick all the air out of his lungs. It sparked the same thing this message has always done.  _ Hope. _ Something he thought he lost long ago. 

“ _ This is our most desperate hour. Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi, you’re my only hope. _ ”

Artoo stares at him, waiting for him to respond. 

  
“Cheap move,” Luke mumbles, regretful for allowing himself to be so depressing. He gives a small worn out smile. His eyes, though tired, now held a small spark inside them.  _ Life. The force. Hope. Love. _ It held them all. He gives Artoo another pat on the head, he knew what he had to do. 

  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Rey sat on a log, dragging a stick along the ground. She drew scribbles, tears invading her eyes. She was determined not to cry. No. Not this time. 

**_Bam!_ **

_ “Hey!” _

Rey is suddenly hit in the head with a small rock. Her head spins around to find, of all people, Luke. He stood behind her, wearing a smile. He looked almost younger in a sense. His hood was off and now he stared at her. 

“Training  _ officially _ begins tomorrow. Don’t be late,” Luke says before walking away. 

Rey watches him go. Before she knows it, a smile spreads. 

_ Yes! _

  
  
  


* * *

  
  
  


Rey’s eyes were closed.

She tried to sleep. To drift away into a slumber. However she couldn’t. Something called her. A force greater than sleep. She felt her body drift closer into the intoxicating light. Towards the siren.

“ _ At night, desperate to sleep, you imagine a temple... _ ”

She sees it. The temple. Life flourishing around it. Faces she didn’t remember. Voices she didn’t know. It’s big, the tip almost touches the sky from down here. 

_ “You see it too.” _

Rey is spun around, the image fading around her. She finds herself in a dark void and across from her a familiar face stood. Her heart drops and her body is ridged. 

Ben.  _ He _ stood across from her. His body is no longer covered by a mask of death. His face is open for all to see. His black shaggy hair, dark brown orbs, pale skin. This was no memory or vision. This was him. The real him.

_ “I knew you were special.” _

“Get away from me,” Rey hisses, reaching for a weapon. However to her dismay, there was no lightsaber belted to her side. This had been a dream.

_ “I wasn’t sure at first, but now I see…” _

Rey’s mouth was full of cotton. It absorbed any liquid in her, making her go speechless.

_ “I don’t expect you to understand—“ _

“I understand clearly,” Rey bites out, “You turned your back on everything— _everyone_ . You’re nothing.”

These words cut deep. His heart is pierced, spewing blood all around. His blood is like acid to her, burning her. She tries to act like his pain doesn't affect her. Like he wasn't getting under her skin.  _ Like he didn't matter. _

_ “You're in danger.” _

“Yeah, you’re here.” Her words are venomous. 

_ “This path you’re going down...it will kill you.”  _ Pacing around her, his gaze strictly on her. His voice echoes, ringing in her head. It trapped her inside a bubble. “ _ Snoke wants you dead. I will be forced to kill you.” _

“Like you would care,” Rey scoffs. “You’ve wanted me dead the moment I met you!” This was a cheap tactic to scare her into submission. To make her turn her back and go home. Go back to the desert planet she came from. Be the scavenger girl who never left. 

“ _ There's so much you do not know.” _

”Then tell me.” Rey steps forward. Her face in his. No longer did she shy away. She knew this man knew more. He wanted to speak. He was so close to telling her everything. Filling in blanks. 

_ “Run _ .” He tells her.  _ “Go as far as you can. Before it's too late.″ _

“I won't run. Not this time.″ Rey shakes her head, refusing to play the coward. “I will become a jedi and you can't stop me.”

Ben’s eyes are like glass. Light reflecting off them. She could see straight through him. He was showing hesitation. Something she's seen before but now was clear. He didn't want to kill her. Why? She didn't know.

“ _ Don’t do this. _ ” He was begging now. His desperate small voice surrounds her, tugging her back. 

“Goodbye, Ben.”

  
Rey feels whatever fake confidence she mustered shatter. 

She didn't fall asleep that night. 

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> This is a part two to my first book, The Force Awakens. You don’t have to but things will make more sense.
> 
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/22430353/chapters/53592850
> 
> Then there’s the prequel that will basically tell you the groundwork for this story. 
> 
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/22345360/chapters/53381272
> 
> Anyways, hope you enjoy!


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